When it rains it pours. This has been Jason’s mantra lately, and he usually says it with a look of defeat on his face. He’s talking about his work schedule. After spending the months leading up to the birth of our baby worried about making ends meet and praying for extra hours, he has been standing under a deluge of work lately and he’s ready to come out of the rain and dry out. But as a man who has never been one to shy away from hard work he is torn between a get it while you can mindset and simply being worn out. I know taking a day of rest once a week, or a Sabbath, is a Biblical principal, but I grew up in a house where Jesus’ teaching on “if your ox is in a ditch, you better get him out” was held in high regard. (Luke 14:5) How does one decide when it’s time to rest?
I know we both need to find a balance between doing the work that is necessary and resting.
I struggle with this, too. As a wife and mommy I never have a day “off”. I only have stolen moments of rest that hopefully add up enough to equal a balanced woman. I am torn between knowing I should take some time alone and wanting to be with Ty all the time. I now understand this philosophy of wearing your baby. If I could strap him to my chest and carry him everywhere for the next sixteen years, I would. But I know that is more about what my heart wants than what is best for him. (I’ve discovered this is the heartbreak of motherhood: what I want vs. what is best.) I’ve also come to terms with the fact that it’s not really date night if the baby comes with us. Even though he is so small you hardly notice him and we wouldn’t have to buy him dinner, he still can’t come every time we go out.
Like tomorrow night when we go out to dinner. Jason’s birthday was almost two weeks ago and we have finally found a few hours where he won’t be working or sleeping! The distance between these opportunities has created some “Ooo I’m going on a date” excitement. I’m thinking about what I’m going to wear. Counting the days since I last washed my hair. I’m planning on wearing makeup. I might even wear shoes that I can’t run in. And tomorrow night will count as rest. We will (hopefully) take a break from being supervisors, employees and parents. We will just be Jason and Abbie, kinda like we were before we started this parenting journey.
P.S. I’m changing our mantra to April showers bring May flowers and looking forward to seeing what blooms.